As a young kid I watched A Bronx Tale movie. One of the many topics is about the borderline between being good to people around you and being respected by them.
The gang boss Sonny had an interesting summary of the survival rules:
You should be tough on people, so that they fear you. At the same time you should be kind to people, so that they need and maybe love you and do not feel urged to kill you. The secret is in the balance between love and hate.
Nowadays, thinking about murder is not among the widespread fears. Nevertheless there are many different forms of deaths in our society. At work your idea might not win if you are not pushy enough. Or if people think you are too light-hearthed even though this is a sign of a life-philosophy (Happy Gilmore) and not a problem solving capability.
Sadly, even though we are mostly not living in a gangster environment, we are still guided by such rules.
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